I've never claimed to be a highbrow movie fan and I'd like to think that I have enough sense to stay away from the truly awful movies but I will admit that I have a certain weakness for sports movies. Now, don't get me wrong, not all sports movies are crapacular but some do border on pandering to the lowest common denominators, you know, "rah-rah, let's go underdogs!"
And yet, here the truth lies before me like a blinking red light on a deserted highway on a starless night - I am a sports movie fan, albeit an apologetic one. Over the years I have tried to balance my weakness out by peppering in a healthy dose of well-made independent films as well as award winning foreign fare and as a whole I don't think I am totally hopeless but the truth remains , I enjoy feel-good movies that take place on the playing field.
So AG, you may be asking yourselves as you read this, what exactly is the point of this particular post? Truth be known, I just felt like writing about something and my brain started working overtime about topics and boom, sports movies just appeared in there. The point, my dear readers, or at this point - reader since I haven't posted a lot on the last few months and know many of you have moved on, is to give you a somewhat comprehensive guide to notable sports movies should you ever want to venture into the genre. To make the journey easier for the uninitiated I have taken the liberty to split up the following into specific sports.
AG's Scoring Key
rah-rah-rah: Very good
rah-rah: good
rah: meh, rent it if it's cheap or on TV
Strikeout/Interception/Foul!: So bad I vomited a little bit in my mouth while watching.
Baseball: Honestly, not as well known to me as, say, football (You know, the American kind) but it is America's favourite pastime.
The Sandlot
Technically a kid's movie but one of the best out there. It captures the purity of the game before egos and multi-million dollar contracts sully the spirit of the game. rah-rah-rah
The Rookie
An older dude (Dennis Quaid) finally gets his chance to play in the big leagues. Sometimes sappy but what do you expect from Disney? rah-rah
Mr. 3000
Ah Bernie Mac, you so crazy! A pretty entertaining story about a retired Brewers player who due to a calculation error has to make a comeback to the game in order to reach the coveted 3000 hits mark since he's based his post-career businesses on the fact that he had reached the milestone. Good story about a player who was selfish his first time around and who realizes the importance of enjoying the game and his teammates. rah rah
Field of Dreams
I saw it a long time ago but I think I liked it. Might have been cheesy. rah
Bull Durham
Hey, remember when people paid good money to watch Kevin Costner? No? Me either but this movie was good nonetheless. rah rah
A League of their Own
No crying in baseball, indeed. Tom Hanks, Geena Davis, Rosie O'Donnell and (shudder) Madonna star in this little ditty about a women's league during the war. Can't remember which war, though. rah
The "Major League" Franchise
Tom Berenger, Corbin Bersen, Charlie Sheen and the black guy who later played the president on the first season on 24. I can't remember his name but it may be Dennis Hays-something. He's also the All-Sate dude. Anyhoo, this movie was made when the Cleveland Indians sucked... And then they didn't 'cause they won the World Series... They may suck again but I can't be bothered to look up their stats in the newspaper. Strikeout!
Angels in the Outfield
Movie about a foster kid who sees angels on the field during California Angels games. Creepy. (And this was before M. Night Shamalayan introduced us to little creepy kids who also saw dead people.) Strikeout!
Rookie of the Year
I always get my crazy blond actors mixed up, is it Nick Nolte or Gary Busey? Oh, it's Busey. Sorry kids, no insane Nolte in this movie about a 12 year old kid who breaks his arms only to find out that when it healed it miraculously healed into a fastball-throwin' strikeoutinating machine and thus gets signed by the Chicago Cubs. So, all in all, very realistic. Strikeout!
Summer Catch
The horror... The horror. Sometimes words cannot describe the feelings that you feel. Oh Freddie Prinze Jr., it may be time to rethink the acting thing and choose a new profession. Strikeout!
Basketball: I don't really like basketball but here goes.
Coach Carter
Samuel L. Jackson plays the coach of an underachieving team. Lots of yelling ensues. Despite this the movie is pretty good with excellent game sequences. rah-rah-rah
Eddie
Whoopi Goldberg stars as a Uber Knicks fan who gets the head coach job as a publicity stunt. Well, screw you PR people because she actually gets the crappy team to start winning. rah
Like Mike
Lil' Bow Wow is an orphan who somehow manages to get and old pair of Michael Jordan sneakers and is suddenly talented like MJ. Foul!
American Football
Remember the Titans
Denzel! That little blond actress from Heroes! Cute boys in tight pants! 'Nough said. Seriously though folks, it's set in the south during the end of segregation so it deals with those kinds of issues. Sometimes funny, sometimes sad. A good analogy would be that it's a little bit rock 'n roll and a lil' bit country. rah-rah
The Replacements
Keanu Reeves plays a QB who doesn't talk a lot nor has to emote much which may be Reeves' perfect role. No, I kid, I kid! I kid because I love. Anyhoo, this is one of my faves because it's got kick-ass football action, lots 'o laughs and never takes itself too seriously. rah-rah-rah
We Are Marshall
True story about Marshall University in West Virginia who lost its entire team and coaching staff in a tragic plane crash in 1970. The story focuses on the rebuilding stage of the team under a new coach (Matthew McConaughey who honestly could give potato charisma if it were too close to him) as well as an assistant coach (Matthew Fox who gives good cry, honestly when he cries, I cry so I sometimes kind of hate Matthew Fox as I prefer to live my life like I am dead inside) who gave up his seat on the doomed flight to a friend thus saving his own life but dooming him to a bad case of PTS with a heavy dose of survivor's guilt. Ian McShane also stars as a grieving father and honestly, it's weird to see the dude that played Al Swerengen not spewing profanity like a sockcuker. (R.I.P. Deadwood) rah rah rah
Friday Night Lights
I've never seen the show because I don't have cable but the movie was decent. It's like to truth about high school football in small town America and dude, it ain't pretty. This movie gave me quite a few insights into Americana, most notably what Tim McGraw looks like without a cowboy hat. rah rah
The Longest Yard
I am not sure if I wholeheartedly could ever believe that Adam Sandler could be have been a professional QB but I guess that's what movies are all about - the suspension of belief. Anyhoo, I never saw the original one so I can't compare it to anything in football terms but there is a soccer/football movie based on the story that is, in my humble opinion, far better. rah
Varsity Blues
Oh Varsity Blues, I remember you! You had James Van der Beek from Dawson's Creek and that other blond actress from Heroes in a scene with strategically placed whipped cream. There's also football and some other stuff like there's more to life than football. rah rah
Soccer/Football
Mean Machine
I mentioned this movie earlier when I was discussing The Longest Yard because it's exactly the same movie, only off the gridiron and on the pitch. It's also the better of the two as the Bobs commentary of the game is worth it alone. rah-rah-rah
Bend It Like Beckham
Who wouldn't like the story of an English girl of Indian heritage who dreams of playing soccer? You wouldn't, you say? Well, I guess I have nothing more to say to you then...
Culture-clashes ensue as well as a strong statement about girl power. See my Posh tie-in? N i c e. rah rah
Goal!
A story about a young dude in LA who dreams of playing for a big club in Europe. Through moxy and talent he gets his wish and ends up playing for Newcastle United. Unlike the above film David Beckham is actually in this movie... for five seconds... with weird eyebrows. Oh, and Alan Shearer makes a couple of appearances too sans weird eyebrows. rah rah
Fever Pitch
I might have this movie's title mixed up with another British film. This one has that blond actor who played Tom Jones (Not the Sex Bomb singer) in the BBC/A&E mini-series. I think it's called something else but Alan Shearer's also in this one too. You go Alan Shearer! rah
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